polyamory

Tag Archive

Scarcity and Abundance Around Sex

I’m in a long distance, open relationship. That can mean a lot of things to a lot of people. My blog is probably due for an update anyways, as I’m always evolving and understanding myself, my needs and my desires better. How I would currently describe my relationship with P: ...

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The Cost and Risk of a LDR

Long distance relationship… living apart together… whatever you want to call it… my love lives across the country.  I get to play house with him for a week to 10 days every 4-6 weeks and it’s lovely. Our love is like nothing I’ve ever experienced.  Our sexual connection is spot ...

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Coming to Terms with what Monogamy Isn’t

I’ve been saying for the more than 2 years since my divorce, and maybe more like 2 decades, “I’m not very good at monogamy.” I was married for 18 years. I cheated physically during a chunk of my mid 20s and I cheated emotionally continuously. Or at least that is ...

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When I Knew I had to be Poly

Life is preparing to change again. The relationship with a sort of expiration date for surely knows he’s going to have to move. For his sake, sooner rather than later is best for him.  We’ve grown incredibly close since deciding to just go for it and enjoy the time we have. ...

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Relationship Role Models

Step One:  What role models have you had for relationships? That’s the first question posed in The Jealousy Workbook: Exercises and Insights for Managing Open Relationships that I received in the mail today. It goes on to ask what monogamous relationships did you witness?  Were they really monogamous?  Was there cheating? ...

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I Want to be Taken Care of — GASP!

“What?!  Michelle is this independent woman.  She swore she didn’t want to be taken care of!  Didn’t she?”  I’m assuming something similar is going through your head as you read the title of this post. I was married for 18 years, in that relationship for 21 years.  In that relationship ...

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New Stages Bring New Challenges

Learning who I am without someone was one stage.   Learning who I am with someone is a new stage. I spent the year after my split from my husband of 18 years learning a lot about who I am without him.  I sat in his shadow for 2 decades. ...

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After I Went Down the Rabbit Hole of Loverships

Last week I wrote about “Lovership”, the idea that I connect with some friends in a more intimate way, which for me includes a lot of touching, and how we can appear as lovers, we are so close.   The writing of that post took me way too long.  Thankfully ...

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Facing the Fear AND the Metamours

I knew I would be meeting one of the women he has started seeing that evening. We also discussed when I would probably be meeting the other one. “What can I expect?” I asked. He started to describe the event where we would meet.  “No, I mean, what can I ...

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Do I Want a Relationship? Learning a New Vocabulary

BFF:  “You been ok lately?” ME:  “I think so.  I feel really un-grounded lately.” BFF:  “Yeah?  Do you know why?” ME:  “I’m not sure.  It feels like my usual struggle with what I’m looking for in relationships.” BFF:  “As in how much you want?” ME:  “Every time I think I’m ...

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