Dating and Relationships

Category Archive

Pet Peeve: Condoms and Men that Don’t Carry Them

I am a very proactive, risk aware, sex practitioner.  I carry condoms.  I carry multiple size condoms.  I am “that girl”.  (I actually carry a bag of supplies if I know what is planned.) What really disappoints me is that almost all of the men I have been with have not ...

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I Remember When I Was Vanilla

I have a vanilla date tonight.  Vanilla meaning someone from outside the kink world.  It reminds me of when I was the vanilla date.  🙂 I loaded Tinder on to my phone for the first time.  It was a day in early September, fairly early in the day, if I ...

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Friends with Benefits

I’m a sex geek.  (A sex geek is someone who geeks out on sex.  I read about it.  I talk about it.  I talk about it very clinically and academically.  It is generally a very non sexy thing for me to talk about, or at least it can be.)  One ...

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Sexual Shame – A Question from a Reader

Occasionally I get questions from readers, or in this case, a request for a topic.  So here we go… “I think you need to do a blog explaining that a woman doesn’t need to apologize for squirting… That’s kinda my goal when I am with them…” Squirting, also known as ...

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Why I Chose to Forgive

Driving to pick up my dog from my ex-mother-in-law’s home, in the first snow storm of the season, after a long weekend in NYC with my best friend and the amazing Betty Dodson, it hit me like a rock, dropping right into my lap.  I needed to see “her” and ...

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Online Dating Don’ts – And How to Scare Me Away in One Easy Step

So, you have found me on any number of social media or dating sites.  You think you want to get to know me better.  You send an introductory message.  I immediately run the other direction.  Occasionally, I may not run right away, but give you subtle suggestions to change your message. ...

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Is First Date Sex Ok?

My motto:  Have sex on the first date, you may not like each other by the second. Seriously.  If the chemistry is right, why not? Now, this is assuming you want to have sex.  This is also assuming that you don’t have personal issues with casual sex.  It is ok ...

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Online Dating, My Love/Hate Relationship

It went something like this: Fairly attractive man contacts me. I engage him in conversation for long enough (a good portion of my morning) that he suggest we meet. I agree. He starts to back pedal. I see the red flag and ask a few questions, the first being, “Is ...

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How to Conquer Rejection

I recently shared my story of my first rejection.  Here is where the story picks up… It had been a few weeks since my first rejection.  I got a lovely message from a very attractive gentleman on my usual dating site.  We spent the week having long conversations on the ...

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Rejection

About a month ago I met a handsome young man for a drink on a Wednesday afternoon. I don’t date 20 somethings but this gentleman I made an exception for. He was military and had a lot of life experience I couldn’t compete with. He was sexually open and our ...

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