“Here…is my list: Things that turn me on…” This wasn’t a grocery list… there were no bread, eggs, butter. Rather, there was a lot of “I like it when you…” Mmmm… all the yumminess.
Back in November I read a post that inspired me: What I Like and Don’t Like. I was inspired to make a list of my turn-ons and turn-offs when it comes to sex, specifically. It was early in one of my relationships. I showed him my list while we were talking at a party. He asked for a copy and the best part? He put the list to use immediately, like that night!
Don’t we all desire “the code” to pleasing your partner(s)? Some might say that having a cheat sheet to pleasure is “killing the mystery”. I don’t agree. While I’m always up for trying something new, I do know there are things I love and there are things I don’t. Why not make that crystal clear for your partner?
For Valentine’s Day I told my partner that I was done waiting for his list. He’d been saying he would provide his for two months. So while I have enjoyed figuring a lot of it out on my own 😉 I really wanted the feedback. I was taking the lead, planning our Valentine’s Day, all I asked from him was that he make his list. That was all I wanted from him this holiday.
That Sunday afternoon the list arrived to my inbox (as well as a printed copy he hand delivered moments later) and as I read the list I saw a lot of our sex listed. I smirked in validation. His turn-ons were a reflection of the sex we were having.
His list included: turn-ons, things he enjoys, things that turn him off (really important to know) and things he’d like to try. The sexiest list ever!!!!
The list was sexy because it validated me, it gave me keys to what really gets him going, and the list of things he’d like to try gave me ingredients for bringing his fantasies to life. Why go in blind when you can just have open, honest conversation? Communication is sexy!