I have a vanilla date tonight. Vanilla meaning someone from outside the kink world. It reminds me of when I was the vanilla date. 🙂
I loaded Tinder on to my phone for the first time. It was a day in early September, fairly early in the day, if I remember. I came across a profile of a man that was in an open marriage. He was upfront about his relationship status in his short little information section that Tinder allows for any pertinent information, which hardly anyone utilizes. I was just out of a marriage that was somewhat open at the end and meeting someone in that situation didn’t scare me. We both right swiped (meaning we were both interested) and we made plans to meet for a drink that evening.
I don’t recall a lot of the details other than that he was one of my first contacts in the local BDSM community. I didn’t know that when I swiped him. But I did know that before I met him in person. We had a very informative conversation, I do recall that. He is a sadist and I remember one comment he made that stands out because at the time it made the hair on my arms stand up, that I am sure. He said something like, “I like to make women cry but not so much my wife. But I can totally do vanilla!” I was vanilla. I believe it was in that conversation where I was also told how I wasn’t really vanilla because I had been in a few threesomes, but trust me, I felt very vanilla in that conversation.
We didn’t have a second date. I kind of blew the kiss at the end of the night and he kind of changed what he was looking for. But we have remained in contact through a kink website that we are both very active in. Because, see, I’m not vanilla anymore. I’ve gone to the dark side. 😉 You can watch some of the change, here on this blog. But that date, he has gotten to witness it from a much different seat. We joke about it at times. I am thankful for that date and a few others. They helped introduce me. They, in all very different ways, helped me explore this side of me that I never knew existed. I am forever thankful to the few that come to mind. Some have become great friends. All are special to me.