Fun with Ropes – How I Learn About Myself

**If you have watched my videos, here on this site, you know I have been exploring the world of BDSM since September.  You can also watch them here.**

We were acquaintances.  She’s always been very welcoming to me.  We have met at many social events but have never really gotten to know each other, though intentions have been there to do so.

Rope class was winding down.  Tonight’s topic was bondage for sex.  Fun, right?!  I had wanted to learn a basic tie but after that was accomplished I really just wanted to be tied.  One of the many fun things about bottoming for rope is that most people get semi naked.  This evening I had that desire. I used to find myself apprehensive.  Most in the vanilla world would never consider getting down to bra and panties in a group setting.  But really, it is not the same as going to the beach?  Either way, I have gotten comfortable and I find it a reminder of how far I have come.  Tonight I wanted that reminder.  I like the reminder.  It was the most comfortable I have been yet, not thinking or wavering about sliding my pants off and pulling my blouse over my head.   Now I just had to find someone to practice the tie just demonstrated by our teachers.  A friend put me to use.  Mission accomplished.

Back to my story.  I was talking to the ginger haired acquaintance, sharing our desire to be tied by the male of the couple teaching the class that evening.  He’s tied me before.  I have huge respect for him and well, he teaches the class.  He’s good.  And he’s fun.  The night was coming to an end, why not kill two birds with one stone.  Let’s ask if he will tie us together.

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During my first rope scene, back in December.

Face to face.  He wrapped feet of rope around us, tying and winding.  It’s fun and intimate.  Snap!  The rope is whipped against my back.  My body reacts.  I have grown to love anticipation.  This time it was anticipation of not knowing when the next snap will hit.  He whips the end of the rope against the back of my partner and I get the satisfaction of feeling her body react too.  New sensations, that for 39 years I never experienced, fear and pain.  Combined, they makes my heart race.  It reminds me that I am alive.  She, being much shorter than I, leans in and sinks her teeth into my breast.  She knows I like to be bit.  Again, a new revelation.  The pattern continued, our top playing with the rope.  Us, the bottoms, reacting to him and each other.  Many times did I want to kiss her but being in such a public setting, I still haven’t let go of that uneasiness of PDA.  I did once, though, place a kiss on her lips, almost without thinking.

It has been a tip toe approach, building relationships within the community, testing my interests, ever so slowly.  The community has taught me much about consent, negotiations, relationships, and communication.  The last few months have given me the opportunity to push my physical limits and explore my body confidence.  The people have welcomed me and I feel at home with this new tribe of mine.  I have made friends that I know will stay in my life for a very long time.  I have pushed myself to explore myself.  I am continuing to gain insight.  I have this wonderful/scary world at my fingertips.  I am eating it a little bite at a time.

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